Monday, November 17, 2008

Checking in

Nothing much to report, but I wanted to check everyone in on the trial and how I'm feeling. 

It's a little ridiculous, but I've been reticent about talking about my symptoms because of the possibility that I'm receiving a placebo instead of actual medicine. I'd hate to chronicle every daily up and down here and then yank the rug out at some future point. I've also learned not to trust many of my reactions to my own body -- every sensation can seem like a symptom, and my baseline level of wellness isn't terrific. This makes it very difficult for me to say what's going on.

That said, I'm starting to feel like I may be getting the drug. The first three-to-four weeks of the trial were quiet; I felt nothing, basically. Then, almost two weeks ago, a tiny little bump popped up in my mouth, quickly followed by a few more. They didn't ulcerate as miserably as mouth sores usually do, but I was encouraged anyway. I also started to feel even more tired and to have some difficulties with my stomach (nausea, lack of appetite, etc.). The big test will come Nov. 26, when I have my first set of bimonthly scans for this trial.

By the way, Elsa is describing her experiences with the brivanib trial at Sloan-Kettering at her fine blog, Living With A Sarcoma. I'm following this closely, because it is an option that I may pursue at some point.

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